The Surreal Moments In Life

We all have them. Those moments where you feel like you have just stepped into the Twilight Zone and nothing is quite what it is supposed to be. Unexpected things that leave you standing there wondering if you heard that right, or did that just really happen type of moments…

A week ago Monday, Nick had a bad night. I mean really bad. I can’t remember now what set him off, but he went into a complete meltdown. As strange as it sounds, I was expecting it. He’s been doing so well with having positive behaviors and overcoming the negative behavior patterns he seemed stuck in. We did a lot of hard work over the summer, but when you are using behavioral modification techniques to change specific behaviors and having success, there is a strange little phenomenon called an “Extinguish Outburst”. Behavior modification is extinguishing the undesired behaviors, then replacing them with the the desired behaviors through correction, reward and consequence. When you seem to achieve the desired results and everything looks fine, then it’s time for the extinguish outburst to happen and it usually happens within a few weeks to a month of the behaviors improving.

As I said, a week ago Monday, Nick had a major meltdown and it lasted for a couple of hours. The entire time, I tried to work with him as much as I thought he was able to handle. It took some work, but finally we got through it and everyone settled down for the night. For the past week, I have felt like I have been holding my breath, waiting. Was this the big, bad final blowout? Have we successfully worked through all the modifications that we needed to?

All week, Nick seemed happy, compliant and easy going. Each day he came home on the bus, I watched to see smiles on his face and his laughter filling the air. He seemed so relaxed, so easy going. Last Friday he did come home early from school. Seems all the heat and humidity gave him a severe headache. He came home around 10:30 in the morning, crawled in bed and slept until 5 in the evening.

I watched. I waited. Only time will tell. Then this morning came. I woke up late and Nick only had 15 minutes to get ready for his morning bus. I told him that Spurg could take him to school. Nick proclaimed that he didn’t want a ride to school, and then proceeded to tell me that he bet he could get ready before the bus arrived.

On a normal morning, it takes Nick 45 minutes to get through the morning routine with help. But this morning, he did everything but shave in the allotted 15 minutes. On the bus he went, and I watched him, slightly stunned. I emailed Nick’s teacher to let him know that he might be a little off since he didn’t have his normal 45 minutes to get ready. His teacher replied that Nick was doing awesome in class. But the next part of the email simply left me stunned, shocked and hearing the theme song to The Twilight Zone playing in my head. “Nick wants me to give him more homework. Would you like me to give him more homework?” I sat there wondering if I had read that correctly, and if not, wondering if I was even really awake or having some bizarre dream.

Most of the morning the teacher and I emailed each other, both of us stunned at Nick’s request. The only time Nick has had homework this year was to make up class work from when he missed a day of school. Nick hadn’t done homework all of last year due to the behavioral issues, but the two years previous, he had small homework assignments everyday.

Several long emails later, I think I have figured it out. Nick is finally feeling secure in the classroom setting. The teacher has successfully created an environment that Nick can function in to his maximum potential. Instead of resenting his teacher as he did last year (and this is the same teacher from last year), he seems to be showing respect. Nick is now seeking the positive attention by showing positive behaviors beyond what anyone expected or hoped for. It also seems that Nick is seeking and craving some one on one attention from his teacher thus turning last years troubled student teacher relationship into a very positive one.

I have to be honest, I have been pondering over the last several hours just how many parents would love to hear the teacher contact them because their child has requested homework. A very surreal moment in time indeed! It will never happen with the average teenager, not in anyone’s lifetime. Understandably, this has left me feeling like I am either in an episode of the Twilight Zone, or that the Alien pod people have taken over one of my children. In reality though, Nick is just being the amazing kid that he is!

I know that I promised a project update, but it will have to wait until tomorrow. Instead, I want to share a little something with you that Nick enjoys so much that his laughter fills the air. Enjoy and I hope you let your laughter fill the air with us!